Thursday, March 15, 2012

Brandon Marshall - Chicago Bear

Hat’s off to Phil Emery.

Going out and getting Jay Cutler’s right hand man? Genius work. For
two 3rd round draft picks, oh and what’s that, we had an extra one
anyway?  Genius Phil, pure genius.

My plebian mind was thinking let’s get aggressive, and go out and get Vincent Jackson.  We have the cap room to snag him right? Especially, if he’s only asking for Ochocinco money. And if that’s what it takes, so be it.  However my hopes were dashed, as Tampa Bay took that a little too literally when they issued him his $55,555,555 contract. Now I’m thinking all the big name WR free agents will surely stay put,
and we’ll be scrambling to make mid-level talent wide outs sound like they could one day be the #1 receiver Cutler so desperately deserves.

Then Phil flies into the danger zone, and snags top-gun Brandon
Marshall.  I can’t help but get bothered by all this media coverage on
how this may not have been as great a move as I think, because
Marshall has a bevy of personal issues.  Look guys, I’m willing to
welcome Brandon Marshall to Chicago with open arms, even if he and his
wife have a lot of baggage.  I don’t care if his wife accidentally
ordered bottle service to her face, and Marshall did in fact go all
empire on some lady when he struck back (allegedly). He’s too good to
worry about it, just look at the history.

Brandon Marshall

 06-07: Allegedly Marshall has a domestic dispute involving his
ex-girlfriend, was nearly run over by his father in a parking lot, and
is accused of fraud when he creates a birth certificate for his Kenyan
friend Barack… 102 receptions, 1325 yards receiving, 7 touchdowns.
 07-08: Allegedly Marshall punches his ex-girlfriend (on several
different occasions), steals her purse, throws a rock at her car, and
forces her to eat dolphin un-safe tuna.  He also was charged with a
DUI after driving the wrong way on a one way street after a game… 104
receptions, 1,265 yards, 6 touchdowns.

08-09: Allegedly Marshall has three different incident reports filed
within three consecutive days all involving his ex-girlfriend.  One
notably involving him punching a moving train off of its tracks into
her Range Rover.  Additionally, the Denver Broncos claim Marshall
insisted they find a roster spot for his pet camel, and that he sold
his condo to live on a train.  Later in the season he only spoke to
the media in Kerouac quotes, and hired Bill Nye the Science guy as his
personal assistant.  Marshall, after all this, is suspended for one
game for violating the league’s personal conduct policy… 15 games, 101
receptions, 1,120 yards, 10 touchdowns.

Phil Emery

Keep in mind that all this goes down during his time spent in Denver.
But have no fear bear fans,  Jay Cutler has said recently that going
forward it will be his “sole mission” to keep Marshall out of
nightclubs after 4am this season.  And if I’m going to trust anything
from this story its Jay Cutler’s track record as an accountability

The bottom line is that, with Marshall, off-field problems equal
on-field solutions. And personally, I am totally fine with that.

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